


Rec Center [Derek Morgan]

by tocxden



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Alternate - Freeform, AlternateUniverse, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Football, Hurt, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, criminalminds - Freeform, derekmorganchild
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-03
Updated: 2021-02-23
Packaged: 2021-03-14 21:20:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,441
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29177862
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tocxden/pseuds/tocxden
Summary: Criminal Minds AUAfter his father's death, Derek found himself in constant trouble until he found the community center and football. He found himself a victim of sexual assault and abuse. Along the way, he befriends six other people. This is the journey of Derek Morgan through his High School Career.Whenever I write descriptions they're always horrendous but I promise the story is worth it. Updates might not be consistent, please just be patient with me.
Relationships: Moreid - Relationship, Sperek
Kudos: 4





	1. Pretty Boy

"Ugh," I muttered while laying my head on the hard metal locker.

"BIG D!" was all I heard from across the hall as I saw my team member walking toward me and my locker.

"Jamie. What the hell could he possibly want, I mean it's not like we're friends why can't this dude take a fucking hint" I thought to myself before muttering to myself just loud enough for him to hear.

"Ugh," I muttered lowly but still loud enough for him to hear.

"Rough practice, Broski."

"Great he thinks this calls for conversation, go home you fucking twat. All this Nigga wants to do is talk about football like do you not do anything else with your life? Fuck." I thought but instead, I kept it short.

"Jamie. Shut. The. Fuck. Up." Said Derek sternly while he slowly turned his head and gazed directly into his friend's deep brown eyes.

"Oh. OH. I-I recognize that look. Yeah. My boy getting laid. BIG D getting that good good. Haha." Said an overly enthusiastic Jamie.

"And Partying. Getting laid, why is he so obsessed with sex, people's sex lives for fucks sake? So weird man. Man, I can't wait to graduate."

"No. No. I- Jamie j-just go away."

"Yo Der-"but is interrupted by an angry Derek

"Why is he still talking to me?"

"Why are you still talking to me? GO AWAY, Jamie just-just go away."

"Aight man. Whatever, you coming to practice or what?

"Gosh," I say before grabbing my bag off the floor, throwing it on my back, and walking away. He started walking in the opposite direction shortly after me but I just wanted to get through the day. Finish class. Go to practice. Go home.

* * *

Advanced level problems usually incorporate congruent triangles, but then go beyond that. To go beyond congruent triangles, we have to use something called CPCTC. It means this. When two triangles are congruent to each other, it is like a super bonanza. All respective elements are congruent. It means there are three pairs of congruent angles and three pairs of congruent sides. Often, proving triangles congruent leads to being able to prove a variety of other grandiose conditions.

Starting with the definition of a parallelogram, several properties can be discovered. We will see that the sides have an interesting property.

"Mrs. Ziminsky was talking a whole lot before she got into the lesson, proofs, what the fuck this have to do with anything in life? Some useless nonsense ain't nobody gives two shits about. Fuck that Euclid Nigga. Probably died a virgin anyway. Huh."

Given parallelogram ABCD with diagonal AC.

Since segments AD and BC are opposite sides, they are parallel by definition of a parallelogram. This means angle BAC is congruent to angle ACD because alternate interior angles are congruent for parallel lines.

Likewise, AD is parallel to BC by definition of the parallelogram. Angle CAD is congruent to angle ACB because alternate interior angles are congruent when lines are parallel.

Segment AC is congruent to itself by the reflexive property.

This means triangle ABC is congruent to triangle CDA by ASA. Since the triangles are congruent, corresponding parts of congruent triangles are congruent (CPCTC). This means segment AD is congruent to segment CB and segment AB is congruent to segment CD. In other words, opposite sides are congruent for parallelograms.

And she still going there is like 5 minutes of class left for fucks sake. Wasting our time. When will I have to prove- Suddenly I was awoken from my thoughts when she asked me a question. "Why me? There are 29 other students in this room. Fuck."

"Yes, Mrs."

"Repeat what I previously said."

Is she serious? She stopped teaching for this bullshit, man. I don't know the fuck you want me to say.

"You said-"RING. "Saved by the bell or so I thought."

"Mr. Morgan I need to speak with you."

"Yes."

"You're failing this class and protocol says that you will no longer be allowed on the Football team BUT I spoke with your Coach, Mr. Buford,

"Son-of-a-bitch. I swear. One day, one day I-"

"Derek?"

"Yes."

"Are you listening to me?"

"Always."

"Okay. Well, I was saying that Mr. Buford thinks you're a good student that's having some difficulties which I completely understand which is why I have spoken to one of your classmates who has agreed to take their time to tutor you. Hopefully, your grades will increase just enough so that you can stay on the team."

"Okay."

"Your tutor is Spencer Reid." She says while giving him a yellow posted a note with his school email written on it sloppy-ass handwriting. It read . "You can use this to contact him about any of your concerns." She utters.

"Okay. Thanks." He says beginning to walk away but turns around suddenly when she touches his shoulder slightly.

"I'm here for you Derek. Remember that."

"Right. Bye, Mrs."

"Why the fuck did she touch me, whatever all I have to do is get through practice, Whew."

* * *

"First on the field, nice."

Derek sets his extra-large gym bag down below the bleachers, opening it just enough to take out his cleats, putting them on, closing his bag after grabbing his ball, headed straight to the cones so he could run a few drills.

Derek's practice is interrupted.

"Fuck."

"Rodney."

"Derek."

"The hell are you doing here."

"You should be a little nicer to me, especially sin-"

"Shut up, Rodney. You and your boys should just leave before Coach gets here."

"Or what? What you going do, Lil' Boy?" this time in very close proximity to Derek who is only a few inches shorter than him.

"What am I going to do? What am I going to do? I want to shove-"

"BOYS! What are ya'll doing on my field?

"We were just leaving Coach." Rodney says before turning to Derek and uttering "This ain't over." Just loud enough for only the two of them to hear.

"It never is."

There he is. My star player. How are we feeling?"

"Great." The young man says in a sarcastic tone that Buford didn't catch and instead earns a pat on his shoulder, freezing at the sudden touch but then relaxing. Approximately ten minutes pass before the rest of the team arrives but once they do Coach separates the offense from the defense and prepares them for a scrimmage.

The game was over and everyone hit the showers, everyone except Derek says don that field a little longer. Football was his happy place for a long time. Sports, in general, filled him with joy and excitement but somewhere along the way it turned into a nightmare. He had an idea as to why but deep down he never truly accepted it – in truth he was scared, scared that once he accepted it everything becomes real.

His best friend, Julian, came out of the showers and found Derek still standing in the field staring at nothing.

"Bro? Fuck are you doing?"

Snapping out of his trance he responded with a "Huh, I was just heading for the showers."

"Bro you was out here for like thirty-minutes, you good?"

"Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?"

"Aight man." Julian said beginning to walk away but then turned around "You coming to Jaime's party tonight?"

"Yeah, of course."

"The party. How did I forget about the party he has one like every fucking week."

"Will there be-"

"Alcohol. Bro, its Jaime there's always alcohol."

"Great. I need something to make me forget about the last sixteen years."

* * *

Derek pulls in front of Jaime's house luckily finding a parking space in between two red SUVs. Upon arrival, the music was blasting through the stereo shaking the surrounding land.

When you wanna a link, pull it up right now

Bodies feelin' tough tell a nigga pipe down

Nigga popped perc said he's feelin' hype now

This a freestyle I ain't ever write down

"How are his ears not blown out yet, Goddamn."

"BIG D! Thanks for coming man. Alcohol's in the kitchen, the ladies are in there too so you know I will get to working come join me, man."

"I think I'm just gone chill with the team."

"Suit yourself more for me-Oh Oh whoa Vanessa what's popping sweetheart."

"God. Party just started and he's already wasted. Fucking idiot. Well, I see Julian and the rest of the boys I'll just sit with them and be a wallflower for the rest of the night. The practice was tiring I deserve it, let me get a drink first."

Derek is at the bar and notices Jaime sprung for the good Vodka so he pours himself a shot, clenching his face to deal with the intense burning sensation.

Money in the bank need a hundred thou

Ima grown man Lil' nigga you a child

We in the streets we going wild

Shorty got the chop and it goes grr pow

"Did you know that consuming alcohol makes the blood rush to your skin's surface, which may make you feel warmer? However, alcohol causes your blood vessels to widen and makes you lose heat faster. Alcohol also impedes the body's process of increasing heat through shivering."

Awkwardly Derek turns to face the pale, lanky, brown-haired kid -- who looked too young to be at that party – "How do you know that?"

"Umm, I 'Reid' a lot."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"So, I assume you know Jaime."

"Who?"

"Jaime, the guy whose party you're at right now."

"My friend invited me, more correctly dragged me, this is not my type of scene."

"Oh really. Then what's your type of scene?"

"Quiet."

"Well, I happen to know that if you go up those stairs and turn left you'll reach the master bedroom. If you close the door you can have all the quiet you dream of. I should know, that used to be my hiding spot when I didn't feel like partying."

"That sounds-"

"HEY!" said a thin, blonde girl walking towards them. She was a few inches shorter than the two men but it might have been more if she wasn't wearing wedges.

"Hey, I was looking for you."

"You sure about that. I never left this spot since we arrived."

"Oh." She says before turning to me. "Derek Morgan."

"Wait. You know who I am?"

"Who doesn't, star quarterback. You're practically a celebrity." She says before turning back to the younger man.

"Well, I just wanted to check on you, I got to go-"

"To Will?"

Without saying a word she smiles, kisses him on the cheek, and walks off towards one of the back rooms where a brown-haired man is seen peeking from behind a door. Then the two men were alone; they sat in silence.

'Cause I'm an evil nigga, I deserve to die in pain

And my heart so cold, I got frostbite inside my veins

I can't see any evil, I put tints inside my frames

I'm in a world so cold, please excuse me for this pain

They sat in silence for a couple of minutes but to Derek, it felt like an eternity – an eternity of comfort as if he was in a haven – he and Spencer. Unsure of why he felt the way he did he ignored it, blamed it on the booze, and went back to sipping on a half-full beer bottle -- that magically appeared beside him – while listening to whatever was playing on the insanely loud stereo system.

'Cause I'm an evil nigga, I deserve to die in pain

And my heart so cold, I got frostbites inside my veins

I can't see any evil, I put tints inside my frames

I'm in a world so cold, please excuse me for this pain

His peace was interrupted when Julian came from behind grabbing Derek's shoulder causing him to freeze briefly but relaxing once he realized who it was.

"Man, I told you to stop doing that."

"Sorry bro but I need a ride home...like now."

"You drunk already?"

"Nah. I just don't have my car anymore."

"You said your pops bought you a new one."

"He did."

"And you busted that one too. Damn. Well, meet me outside before I change my mind."

"Thanks, bro you a lifesaver."

"Whatever."

After taking one more shot he looked toward the young man he just met.

"Ugh, nice meeting you..." said Derek dragging out the last vowel as a signal to the younger man to give him his name

"Oh. Spencer. Spencer Reid."

* * *

It was Monday – the worst day of the week – and Derek had to find ways to avoid Julian even though they have all but one class together and then football practice. If he was going to succeed he would have to learn very quickly but before he left the house his phone rang, Surprise, surprise it's Julian.

"Umm what do you want?" uttered Derek lowly.

"I was wondering if you could swing by and pick me up, my dad-"

"I can't I'm dropping my sisters off this morning so ugh catch you at the first period."

"Oh, all right then catch you later." but before Julian could finish the final part of his sentence the line clicked and Derek was gone.

It wasn't a complete lie he DID have to take his sisters to school but he could've swung by Julian's house especially since they live about two blocks from one another. Derek knew he wouldn't be able to handle seeing him especially not after what happened.

"God, why does this shit happen to me? Why can't I be a normal fucking teenager, please please I just-" his thoughts were interrupted by his sister who turned to him and stared at him worryingly observing the pain in her brother's eyes.

"Der, you all right?"

"Couldn't be better just tired. Mondays you know." He said while forcing a chuckle and a slight smile which quickly faded away when he entered the school parking lot.

"Ma said she'll pick you up because I have practice this afternoon, sound good?"

"Yep, thanks." They said in unison before walking off toward the entrance of the building.

When he thought he was in the clear he heard a familiar voice from behind him and without turning around he muttered to himself, "Buford."

"Just the man I wanted to see. How's my star player feeling? You practicing?"

"Always."

"Great. Remember I spoke to you teacher no ditching you tutor or else I bench you, all right."

"Got it." He said giving the older man a thumbs up and a stiff smile.

"God, I hate him so much. God, I hate him so much," he muttered to himself before slamming his fist onto the roof of his car and sighing loudly.

* * *

Cafeteria

"Yo, Jaimie where's Derek?"

"I don't know last time I saw him was during the second bell he was at his locker."

"Oh." He said biting his bottom lip before reaching for his bag and said I will be right back. No one seemed to be paying attention as they were more focused on Xavier and how many extra-large marshmallows he could fit in his mouth.

Julian looked as if he was running to something like he was The Flash getting ready to save the day. Backpack half hanging on his shoulder, his hands tightly gripping some papers so they don't fly away breathing like a maniac as if he heard his significant other was just mugged and fighting for his life at the hospital. Although, he was brought back to reality when he bumped into a skinny white kid carrying a lunch tray knocking them both down drawing way too much attention to the scene. Julian stood up gathering his papers and quickly shoving them in his bag before continuing his little sprint leaving the skinny kid on the floor.

"Oh my goodness! Spence are you okay?"

"Yeah. I'm fine but my coffee isn't," he said looking down at the mess of iced coffee on the floor. She smiled helping him up so he didn't slip. "I still don't understand why you drink iced coffee all year round even on the coldest days of the year."

Before he had a chance to respond a quirky blonde chimed in with, "Because he is a raging bisexual."

"I-" but was interrupted when the quirky blonde responded once again with, "Actually nothing my love. You are a raging bisexual who OD's on sugar because it's the only thing consistent in your life right now."

"I hate you, Penelope."

"I know." She says while showcasing her signature smile.

"Anyway, who was that guy. Do you know?" asked Penelope

"Never seen before." Said, Spencer

"I think he's on a sports team football maybe, I don't know." She says drawing the attention away from the scene to her boyfriend, William LaMontagne Jr.

* * *

"Yo, Derek!"

"Yo, Big D!"

"Yo, Derek. Can you turn the JUGS Football Machine off for one second?"

"Hey, man what's up?"

"What's up? You been acting weird all day and then instead of being in the cafeteria your out here."

"Is there a rule that says I have to spend my break in the cafeteria?"

"Well, no but-"

"Okay then."

"Derek listen to me." He said grabbing the other man's arm suddenly causing him to jolt backward and pull his arm away from Julian's grip.

"Don't touch me. You don't get the right to touch me."

"Yo, Der what's the problem?"

"Get out of my face."

"What?"

"Get out of my face."

"I think yo-

"GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY FACE JULIAN OR I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL..." but he stops himself placing his hand up as if surrendering and started to walk away. Julian is confused but yells back.

"Or you'll what. What is Lil' Derek gonna do?"

The younger man stops walking, turns around, and simply says, "You know what Julian. Don't call me. Don't come by my house. We're done."

* * *

The practice was rough especially for Derek; his head just wasn't which made it very difficult for the team. How could they feel confident for their upcoming game if their 'Arsenal' wasn't loaded? He couldn't dwell on his relationships for much longer especially if he was going to make good use of his newfound tutoring sessions.

For approximately twenty minutes Derek sat in the library waiting for Spencer, normally he would've been extremely irritated but truthfully didn't want to be there so the longer the delay the better.

Five. Seven. Ten minutes passed but Spencer was nowhere to be found; Derek was ready to go and whipped out his phone to email his tutor but then receives a call from an unrecognizable number.

"Hello?"

"Hi, is this Derek Morgan?"

"Yeah. Who this?"

"Spencer Reid. I hope it's not awkward that I have your phone number but I had an emergency at home so I had to deal with that so if you want to reschedule I completely understand. If you're willing I can meet you somewhere."

"No, I think it's best if we just reschedule. Is tomorrow okay?"

"Sure."

"All right"

* * *

"Hey, baby. How was school."

"Great." He said with a sarcastic smile. "Damn. I'm becoming at pretending I'm all right when I'm not. Humans are so fucking gullible, and so good at inflicting pain on others. Man, maybe I should have met up with Spencer at least then I wouldn't be alone with my thoughts. God, you're such an idiot. Stereotypical jock. AHHHHH."

"...which do you want?"

"Was she talking the entire time? Damn, I need to start paying attention. What the fuck I'm supposed to say?"

"Derek? Which do you want?"

"Of?"

"To eat. Your sisters want to order pizza but I also made my famous casserole-"

"I'm not hungry so I'm going straight to bed."

"Baby are you sick."

"No Ma just a tough practice. I'm tired." "And angry. I'm tired, angry, and sad."

"Okay." She said in a faint whisper.

He heads upstairs throwing his bag in the corner of my room. "I know I have homework but I could give two shits right now, I won't be able to focus. God, I hate life. I could tell Jaimie to throw another party tonight allowing me a chance to get wasted but that caused the problem in the first place. Fuck. Maybe I'll- no never that, get it together Derek. Maybe you should study with him, yeah, I'll do that."

He slipped his iPhone 6 from his Adidas sweatpants and went to recent calls dialing the most recent number, it rang for a few seconds and then "Hello?"

"Umm Spencer. Is the option to study still open?"

"Oh sure yeah. Where do want to-?"

"My house?" Normally Derek kept his home life separate especially from someone he barely knew but he needed comfort and home is his comfort.

"Okay. Where do uh-"

"I'll send it to you."

"Okay. I will be there then."

"Thanks, man."

"See you soon."

"Bye."

Ten minutes later

"Derek you have a guest."

"All right, I'm on my way down." He says quickly throwing dirty clothes into a hamper and bringing that to the bathroom as he made his way downstairs.

"Thanks for coming."

"My pleasure. Shall we go upstairs?"

"Yeah, I have a desk in my room so we can work there."

"Perfect."

After making their way upstairs Derek offers Spencer a drink but he declines and they go straight to work.

"To help you I want to know what exactly you struggle with."

"Proofs trip me up the most but I have trouble with everything, to be honest."

"Okay, so we'll start from the beginning and work our way up."

"Sounds good."

Two hours later

"Hey it's late and tomorrows a school day, do you want to stay here and then I can swing you by your place early in the morning, wait for you and we'll go to school together."

"Bro, what the fuck is wrong with you? Nigga you barely know this kid, what are you doing? You're weird just for that he probably finna say, Nah, I'm good."

"That would be helpful. Thanks."

"What?"

"Oh. You were just being nice I'm sorry for imposing I-I"

"No, its fine I just wasn't expecting you to say yes. Well in that case you can have the bed and I'll sleep over here pointing to a love seat in the corner of the room.

"No, it's your room I-"

"I insist it's the least I can do after you came out here."

"It wasn't that far."

"Yeah but it's late, I just want to show my gratitude."

"Well thank you."

After deciding on their sleeping arrangements Derek slid his shirt above his head revealing a beautifully sculpted six-pack which most definitely gained the attention of his guest who was practically glaring at his torso. Although, Derek didn't seem to mind because he was used to changing in front of his teammates.

"Goodnight."

"Wait, you think you could leave a light on."

"You scared of the dark."

"No, I just sleep better with the light on." This statement caused Derek to chuckle but he leaves one light on.

"Thanks, Goodnight."

"Night." Pretty boy

Word Count: 3898


	2. The Last Game

East Side Energizers: 07

Ocean City Operatives: 14

It's the second quarter the Energizers are down by 7; the Coach called a timeout. "Gentleman we're slacking out there but I'm going to try something different. Derek, I want you running 'Pentagon'. Ya'll memorize the play right." A series of "Yes" follow so Coach brings the team into a group hug shouting "1...2...3 Energizers. Let's go."

On the field everyone is in position, Derek shouts, "LINCOLN 80, LINCOLN 80 SET HUT!" and with that, the Center passes the ball to Derek who is looking for the open man. The play is going as planned, everyone is in position #15 and #4 have a clear path to the end zone but instead of following through Derek tries to run it.

He performs a stutter-step but is taken aback by Brandyn Flynn. The commentators surprised by the easy play practically yell into the microphone, "Pressure coming right up the middle and it's Brandyn Martin with the sack. Completing rocking his entire world."

"Bro, you knew the play was stupid, the fuck is wrong with you? Get out of your head. We gotta a game to win. Oh great here he comes, "What Julian?"

"I was WIDE open but you knew that didn't you?" he says with his helmet now removed.

"If he keeps talking I will for real clock this Nigga. Shut up, Julian."

"Oh, so you too good to talk to me now?"

"Nah. I'm just focused." He says removing his helmet.

"You're not if you making horrific fucking plays. Bro what's good with you."

"If you get off my dick then maybe I wouldn't be so pressed. Then again that's probably what you want, isn't it? Fucking-"

"Pussy. Yeah, you a pussy that's why you quiet all of a sudden."

"Watch your mouth."

"Oh yeah."

"Yeah," Derek says stepping closer to the other male and looking him directly in the eye with a straight face. That's when Jaime shoves him with enough force he is knocked to the ground but he gets up quickly – angry and irritated. It all happened so quickly, in one sweeping motion Derek's fist connected with the other man's cheek. Within seconds Julian is on the floor, bleeding from a nasty laceration on his cheekbone which is already bruising.

"Damn that felt good. Shit, maybe better than I imagined." Standing there watching my best friend bleeding – in pain – should have made me uncomfortable but I felt better than ever as if the world was at MY disposal. Too bad Coach benched me subbed in that Thomas kid, whatever the score is still 07-14 we ain't gonna win."

"D, what's wrong with you?"

"Nothing. Couldn't be better Coach."

"Now you and I both know that's a lie. What's-"

"I'm gonna head to the locker room. Since I'm benched the rest of the game there's no point in sitting here." And that's exactly what he did. Derek went straight to the locker room, took a shower, and sat there alone – he and his thoughts. His mind was racing, the rage inside him was boiling, the adrenaline was pumping and he needed to hit something like NOW. So that's what he did and after a couple of rounds between him and the locker, his knuckles were bruised, sore and dripping, and dark red blood.

He didn't believe he was in the locker room that long until the rest of the team starting sprinkling in looking sad and tired. "They lost how'd I know that was gonna happen, Pshh." He said grabbing his bag and heading for the exit when someone grabbed his forearm causing him to tense up. He turned to see who it was but remained tensed when he realized it was his Coach. "My office. Let's go." He did as he was told shuffling quickly into the small office that doubled as a storage room, sitting down in a metal chair that faced Coach's desk. Carl took a seat behind his desk hands interlocked staring at Derek for a few minutes before speaking.

"What's going on with you? You're not following through with plays, picking fights, visibly irritated...this is not the Derek I recognize."

During this 1v1 session with Buford, the young boy was different his head was down eyes more focused on his dark black laces than the message his Coach was trying to relay to him. He looked as if he didn't want to be there, as if he was scared – small even. This isn't new behavior, he always felt this way when he was with Buford especially when it was just the two of them.

"Why does he call me that? I just wish it would stop like I'm not your son. Fucking-" he has snapped out his thought when Buford now sitting on the front edge of his desk says, "Talk to me son." This causes Derek to look up staring intently at the older man. They stayed like that for about 10 minutes until the last of the team left the locker room, leaving them ALONE.

"If you're not going to talk to me then maybe I'll just give you a little motivation..."

"Fine. You want to know what the problem is?"

"I do."

"My father."

"Passed away."

"My father's birthday is coming up and it's always hard for everyone, so my head wasn't in the game. All right. Is that what you wanted to hear?" This wasn't entirely a lie his father's birthday was coming up – in five months.

"Yes, D but that's not the only thing I want to hear." And he walked over to the door closing it, turning the lock, and walking back towards the young man placing his hands on both shoulders squeezing them gently. Leaning forward he spoke letting the word "Relax." Ring soundly in the younger man's ear. 

* * *

It was later than normal when Derek arrived home which caused his mother to become hysterical and scorn him once he walked through the door; if his head were in the right place he would've given her a hug, apologized, and offer to make dinner but instead, he simply uttered, "Sorry. I'm tired, so I'm going straight to sleep" and marching off to his room.

After what happened he knew he couldn't sleep so he sat there on his bedspread crying.

"God, why me? What did I do that was so wrong, that was so bad? Please-", but his thought was interrupted by his sobs and muffled cries. He eventually became weary from the crying and fell asleep.

* * *

The next morning Derek felt awful the reality of what occurred yesterday finally hit him so he told his mother he wasn't feeling well and ended up staying home.

"Ok baby. I prepared some chicken soup; it's in the refrigerator, so all you have to do is heat it."

"Thanks, Ma."

"That's why I'm here." And with that, she went downstairs, grabbed her keys, and headed to work. The coast was clear once Derek heard the engine hum and heard the car pull out the driveway. For the next two hours, he sat in bed – mostly sleeping but occasionally reviewing some football stats on his phone. It was all going well until his phone rang. Julian.

"WHAT." He answered with a stern tone.

"Yo, I forgive you for yesterday Coach told me about ya Pops my bad for be-"

"Woah, did I say want your sympathy?"

"Bro?"

"Did I say I want your sympathy?"

"Well no but-"

"Okay then goodbye, Fuck you" and the line clicked.

"I lost my best friend for good this time. Why? Over some dumb shit but it's not my fault is it? Nah it is his – that Son-of-a-bitch." He says not standing up heading toward his bathroom. For a minute he just stands there staring at his reflection in the mirror trying to figure out where the time went? How did I end up here? Why am I still here? God". He mutters to himself before opening the cabinet and pulling out a small orange bottle. It read: Adderall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Fun Fact: The term "cliffhanger" is considered to have originated with the serialized version of Thomas Hardy's A Pair of Blue Eyes (which was published in Tinsley's Magazine between September 1872 and July 1873) in which Henry Knight, one of the protagonists, is left hanging off a cliff.
> 
> Word Count: 1323


	3. Hospitalized

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I hate pain like a majority of people but it adds a certain spice to Wattpad stories.  
> TW: Sexual Assault, Fighting, Bloody Violence, and Drug Overdose

Flashback  
It was Freshman year and Derek had only been on the football team for 4 months but within that short period Buford took a liking toward him; spending extra time with him on the field before the rest of the team arrives and after they leave. At first, their bond was similar to father-son but then it twisted into something more deviant. 

It was Tuesday, the practice had ended two hours ago but Coach asked Derek to stay later so they could work on some ‘drills’. By the time Coach was finished it was a little past 9:00 P.M., and the custodians were closing up. He felt a wave of nausea, anger, and sadness flood his body and he knew he couldn’t go home at least not yet. Instead, he took a detour and wound up in an empty church parking lot; after several breathing exercises he worked up the courage to go inside. 

Upon entrance, he was surrounded by a tall wall, exquisite paintings, tall stained-glass windows. Expectedly the church was empty aside from the priest who was lighting candles at the altar. Derek didn’t interrupt the priest he didn’t even signal he was there, just sliding in a pew, arms resting on the pew in front while he kept his head down. He sat quietly unsure of what to say to the Big man upstairs whom he hasn’t spoken to in three-four years. 

“I’m back and I need you. I n-need you. I need the God that is supposedly almighty and all-so-powerful. Where is the God that is supposed to shine a light on the darkness? Isaiah 42:16 “And I will lead the blind in a way that they do not know, in paths that they have not known I will guide them. I will turn the darkness before them into a light, the rough places into level ground. These are the things I do, and I do not forsake them.” 

“According to your old-ass book, you said you would turn the darkness into light making rough patches smooth and you wouldn’t ABANDON them – us.” It was as if he vomited everything that was bothering him leaving him light-headed and empty. 

* * *  
“Hey, baby. How was practice?”

“Great. Kind of tired though I’m gonna lie down.”

“Well all right, Love you baby.”

“Yeah. Love you Ma.”

He did lie down but he couldn’t sleep, the church didn’t help it made him more irritated so he decided to put on his earphones, open Soundcloud, and play his ‘sadboihrs’ playlist.

First song: NF’s Only.  
I can't be the only one who's lonely tonight  
I can't be the only—  
Yeah, does anybody feel like me?  
Show of hands, I don't need a lot, I just wanna find my peace  
Yeah, why you throwing rocks, oh, you wanna kill my dreams?  
Okay, tell me everything I'm not  
Do you think I didn't know those things?  
Always been a little lost and I still might be  
Life's hard, but it is okay (It's okay)

After the song concludes Derek sits up, feeling worse than he did before, grabs his phone until, scrolling in his contacts, he pauses and stares for about a minute before pressing the name. The phone rings for a few minutes until…

“Derek?”

“J, man what’s up?”

“I just renewed my Gold membership, you wanna play 2k?”

“Word?”

“Yeah.”

“Cool, No cheating though or D, I swear to Go…”

“I don’t need to cheat. I’ll whoop you any day.” 

“Whatever. I’m headed out, I’ll be there in five.”

“Ight.” 

And with that the line clicks and Derek sit, thinking that even in the worse scenarios Julian -- his brother from another mother -- will always stick beside him. 

* * *  
The next day Derek wasn’t feeling well so he kept his head down in class, skipped lunch using that time to nap on a bench in the locker room, and straddled along until his tutoring session that afternoon. 

“Hi,” Derek says while waving at Spencer.

“Hey. You ready.” Said Spencer earning a slight smile from Derek. 

He was still tired but somehow Spencer’s presence made him feel something, something that wasn’t the tired, angry kid who played football. Something that made him forget the horrific things Buford did when they were alone, that made him forget the grudge he held against Julian. With Spencer, his whole world felt complete as if his father was still alive. 

“Yeah.” He said, pulling his binder out of his bag, opening to the Geometry homework packet. “Let’s get started.” 

After two hours of ramblings, they ended their session for the day and started packing up their backpacks. 

“Yo, Spencer, Jaimie is having a party tonight, do you wanna come? I know it’s not your scene but you know- I thought maybe- I don’t know. If you…nevermind forget it.” 

“What the fuck is wrong with you? You don’t want shit to do with them, so why the fuck would you be going to Jaimie’s party? You’re a fucking idiot.”

Suddenly his thoughts were interrupted when the little white boy responded, “Sure.”

“Oh Ok. Wow. Can’t believe he wants to go. Should I pick you up or-“

“NO!” “I- 'll just meet you there.”

“Ok well, let me see your phone.” He says taking the unlocked phone and typing Jaimie’s address into the Quick memo application. “There. Party starts at 6:00. See you there. I guess.” Derek says, before grabbing his bag and walking towards the exit. There was no practice so he went straight home. 

* * *

It's a whole lot of ways I can get my cash up  
Nigga you ain't got no backup, you should back up  
All the hoes say I'm handsome, I got my bands up  
I got bands, now my head up for a ransom

It was 6:45 and Derek had just arrived. He knew he told Spencer 6:00 but that still did not change the fact he does not even want to be there in fact, he could hope back in the car and leave right now but then he sees him, his reason for being at the party in the first place – Spencer. The tall, white boy was walking towards him, obviously coming from the bar, judging by the red solo cup in his hands. For a minute Derek’s world freezes; at that moment the music stopped and it was just Spencer, his chocolaty locks bouncing with each step, the sunset hitting his pale skin at just the right angle as if an Angel was in his presence. He was mesmerized but that all ended when he spoke, bringing him back to reality – the party he dreaded. 

“Derek?”

“Hmm”

“You okay?”

“Yeah. I was just thinking.”

“About?”

“You’re full of questions.”

“Well, you kind of owe me.”

“For?”

“Saying the party started at 6, but not showing up until 30 minutes after.”

“Look, I’m sorry abo-“

“It’s fine. I just wish you would’ve told me so I was prepared. I ended up sitting at the bar alone for thirty-minutes but still, it would’ve been nice to know in advance.” He says before a sudden burst of laughter erupted between the two of them. 

After the laughter calmed down Derek asked, “So, are you gone tell me what’s in the cup?”

“Seltzer.” Uttered Spencer causing Derek’s face to scrunch up in disgust.

“What? It’s healthy.”

“Oh, so you’re a health nut.”

“No, it’s just that my mom likes Seltzer and we had so many at one point I decided to try one and now I’m in love.” 

“Do you at least drink the flavored ones?”

A brief silence gave Derek the answer he dreaded. “Spencer Reid! I’m revoking your Seltzer privileges and I’ll be getting you a soda.” 

“Fine but if my blood sugar rises it’s your fault.” He says causing Derek to lift his hands in surrender allowing Spencer the perfect opportunity to snatch his cup back. Spencer smiles drinking the seltzer causing Derek to roll his eyes. 

“How about we head inside,” Derek suggests.

“Perfect. It’ll allow me to open another can of Seltzer.”

“Are you trying to spite me?” Derek questioned but before Spencer could respond Julian walks towards the pair, “YeAh, ArE tRyInG tO sPiTe Me?” he says mocking Derek. 

“What do you want Julian?”

“Nothing. I’m just trying to figure out why you replaced me with this…” he pauses for a minute hoping to build up dramatics before uttering, “…twink.”

“Watch your mouth.”

“Oh. I get it. Dom protects his Sub.” Julian says, now facing Spencer he looks the boy up and down before turning back to Derek.

“Who knew Big D would be interested in some Lil’ D.” Once he finished the sentence Julian was on the grass cupping his face, as his homeboys stood watching the blood leak out of his nose. It was silent for about five minutes until Derek spoke, “Try me again. Nigga, I dare you.” 

“Gladly.” And with that Derek was on the grass being punched and kicked repeatedly by Julian’s goon squad, the football team. 

After 30 minutes they stopped, walked away, and everyone resumed partying, everyone except Spencer. He couldn’t take his eyes off him, bloodied, and bruised. 

“My brothers, my team, the guys I’m supposed to trust them, on AND off the field just betrayed me,” he mutters to himself, too furious to comprehend the extent of his injuries. Spencer leans down, holding his hand out to help him. 

“Maybe we should go.” And without another word Spencer leads Derek to the passenger seat of Derek’s car and drove him home, walking him to the doorway. 

“You can go now.” 

“You sure? I can help-“

“I SAID YOU CAN GO NOW!” And with that Spencer hesitantly backs away leaving Derek shuffling through the doorway, slamming it, sending a shiver through Spencer’s bones. He stood there frozen for a minute trying to take it all that had happened until he was awoken by the buzzing of his cellphone. 

He had an unread text message. 

Derek Morgan:  
You won’t have to tutor me  
for the next few weeks.  
Spencer Reid:  
Derek, what you went through  
was traumatic, No one’s expecting  
you to do it alone. I’m here to  
help, if you’ll let me.  
Derek Morgan:  
Go home. 

Spencer Reid:  
Is typing…

Derek Morgan:  
Go home, Spencer.

And with that he was gone, all form of communication cut off leaving Spencer, once again, alone standing, contemplating, worrying for someone that wasn’t even his friend or was he? Whatever they were Spencer cared – deeply and it hurt to know that he was being shut out. 

After sending Spencer that last text he looked through his bedroom window to see the little genius still standing, waiting for Derek to possibly change his mind, running straight into his arms but that wasn’t going to happen, not today anyway. 

“God, this kid is stubborn. Go home, Spencer. Just go home.” He mutters to himself before stepping away, letting the curtain fall into place behind him as he straddles towards his bed. He eases his way onto the bed careful of his injuries he sits back against the bed frame and pulls out his laptop. He begins typing into Google but is interrupted when his mother walks into his room. He quickly closes his laptop, shoving back into his bag. 

“Hey, baby.” She says sitting on the edge of the bed. “Do you want to talk about it?” she questions earning silence from her son. “Baby-“ 

“Nah, I’m good. I was finna get some sleep so it is fine.” Her mother’s intuition kicks in because she knows her baby isn’t fine, she doesn’t need the bruises to see that. “Baby, talk to me.”

“I’m fine Ma. Just let me sleep. I’m tired.” 

“Derek?”

“MA!” he yells agitated so she backs away but she feels helpless, to know her baby is going through something and he refuses to tell her about it. She respects his wishes leaving the room, closing the door quietly. 

He got up and hobbled to the bathroom and stared into the mirror at his once beautiful face that was sculpted by the god of chocolate thunder, and hit his fist against the side of the sink. He was angry but at who? Himself or Julian? He wasn’t sure and at this point, he didn’t care so he opened the medicine cabinet this time pulling out a small vial. He looked himself in the mirror, sighing heavily, and spoke, “I’m sorry.” 

Flashback

His peace was interrupted when Julian came from behind grabbing Derek’s shoulder causing him to freeze briefly but relaxing once he realized who it was. 

“Man, I told you to stop doing that.”

“Sorry bro but I need a ride home…like now.”

“You drunk already?”

“Nah. I just don’t have my car anymore.”

“You said your pops bought you a new one.”

“He did.”

“And you busted that one too. Damn. Well, meet me outside before I change my mind.”

“Thanks, bro you a lifesaver.”

“Whatever.”

After taking one more shot he looked toward the young man he just met. 

“Ugh, nice meeting you…” said Derek dragging out the last vowel as a signal to the younger man to give him his name

“Oh. Spencer. Spencer Reid.”

* * *  
“Damn bro I aint know it was like that.”

“Whatchu mean?”

“You and that Nigga back there.” He said pointing in Spencer’s immediate direction.

“WHAT?” Bro, it aint like that.”

“You sure?”  
“What are you trying to say, bro?” Derek replying agitated. 

“Nothing, nothing I just- nevermind.”

“You might as well say it now.”

“It just looked- You All I’m saying is you looked at him the same way you used to look at Savannah.”

“What does that even mean? You must be dirt drunk, I’m taking you home, Ight.”

“It means you look at him with love and admiration. The same way you looked at your Savannah, your girlfriend-“

“EX-GIRLFRIEND!”

“Ex-Girlfriend whatever you look at that Nigga the same way. It’s kind of funny because I never thought you are into them little lanky ass Niggas but here we are. Get it I guess” he said cracking a smile as he entered the passenger’s seat of the vehicle. Derek quickly followed, hopping into the driver’s seat and slamming on the acceleration and within minutes they arrived at Julian’s house. 

They sat there in silence for roughly five minutes before Julian spoke. “I’ll see you tomorrow man, Ight.”

“Get out of my car.”

“What?”

“Get out of the car?”

“Ight, I don’t know what your problem is but whatever.”

“MY PROBLEM?”

“Yeah ever since we left that party you have been acting like a little bitch”

“Me?”

“Who else?” questions Julian causing Derek to scoff, shake his, and hit the steering wheel gently. Then, he decided to get out of the car and open the passenger’s side forcing Julian to exit the vehicle. “Get out.”

“Ight.” he laughed, mostly to himself but Derek was furious, and annoyed so grabbed his “brother” by the collar forcefully and yanked him out of the vehicle, still holding onto him he shoved him against the side of the car looking straight into his eyes.  
“You debating whether or not to kiss me, huh?” he said with a smirk forming on his face. 

Now, Derek was fuming and without hesitation, he knocked Julian to oblivion sending blood splatter everywhere – his car seats, his clothes, shoes, and the entirety of the younger man’s face. He stared down at the other man lying unconscious on the grass, blood oozing from everywhere yet, Derek Morgan didn’t feel guilty. After five minutes he closed the passenger’s door, hopped in the driver’s side, and rode away – not home – he couldn’t so instead he drove to his favorite spot on the lake. For a while, he sat and stared at the open water but then he felt it the urge, the monster he dreaded with all his heart calling out to him – normally he could fight it but not tonight – so – he reached into the glove compartment and pulled out a vial and a needle. 

He ripped the packet open, messily, taking out the needle and inserting it into the top of the vial. He pushed down on it gently watching it fill with the clear substance not stopping until the bottle was empty from which he viciously shoved the needle into his arm feeling the cool liquid flooding his veins relaxing his muscles, his eyelids becoming heavier until they can't stay open anymore and he is consumed by darkness. 

The Next Morning

Waking up he felt groggy, lightheaded, and confused but after blinking rapidly a few times the reality of where he was and what had occurred the night prior all came back to him but he didn’t want to dwell on it for too long. Remembering he needed to get home he cursed himself and started moving urgently. 

“Aww shit. Shit. Shit. Fuck.” He mumbled to himself starting the ignition and breaking all the traffic laws while simultaneously trying to think of an excuse as to why he’s coming home at six in the morning. He says a quick prayer hoping his mom’s still asleep but he used up all his prayers because once he parked the car his mom was standing on the porch, arms crossed combined with the “I’m gonna whoop your ass, I don’t care how old you are facing.”

Reluctantly he exited the vehicle and walked straight toward her, eyes down his brain focused on the thumping of his heart. 

“Where were you?” she says, too angry to notice the dried blood on her son’s clothing.

“Out.” He says testing her patience. 

“DEREK!”

“MA!” he says pushing past her to head inside. Desiree and Sarah are up watching television but he walks straight past them to his bedroom, slamming the door causing the pictures on his wall to shake violently. Everyone in the house froze, surprised by what had just happened but after the initial shock the ladies gathered at his door urging him to “come out” and “talk about it.” His high was long gone so he felt every ounce of physical and emotional pain but he slid his back down the door and drowned out the noise with his silent cries until sleep took over. 

“Derek?” whispered a voice. 

“Derek?” whispered the voice again. 

“DEREK” yelled the voice-only this time he was snapped out of his dream world back to reality. He was dazed, dizzy and his vision was spotty but after a few minutes, he was able to see the person that called his name. 

“Who are you?”

“Wells. Harrison Wells. I’ve been your Doctor while you were out.”  
“Out?” 

“You have been comatose for the past three weeks.”

“What? How?”

“We found a substantial amount of Hydrochloride in your system.”

“You mean I OD’d”

“Yes.”

“Where’s my mother?”

“She had to go to work but there is someone who would be glad to see you. He’s been here every day for the past three weeks. Even slept here sometimes.” The Doctor continued to speak but Derek zoned him out praying that whoever was “glad” to see him wasn’t Julian, his so-called brother. 

“God please don’t be Julian. Please don’t be Julian. Ple-“in amidst his prayer he was caught by surprise. 

“D”

“Carl?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hello. Did you like it? 
> 
> Word Count: 3227


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